I AM...ABOVE AVERAGE

I am “above average”
My life is just fine.
I’m trapped in the middle
With no way to shine.

I’ve never been on drugs
Or out on the street.
Nothing to rise above,
I’m already strip.

My parents are living
Money-wise, they’re well.
They’re less kind and supportive
For that, I’m in hell.

But sometimes, just sometimes
It can’t be controlled
If you’re born better off
Or out in the cold.

“Your parents make enough

Anf they cannot cover you!”
But they don’t understand,
I have siblings, too.

Too rich to qualify
But too poor to pay
I am a Nigerian, middle class,
And I’m not okay

I never thought I’d say
“I wish my life stunk;
Then people would listen
Not toss me like junk.”

I do have depression;
Now I seem unique.
But I will not use it
For show, like a freak.

I guess I’m a soft head.
And also not deranged
Do I have to use these traits
To truly prevail?

When I think I have won
The prize always goes
To the gut-wrenching story
The prejudice shows.

I may not seem helpless,
Weak, or downtrodden
But I still deserve help
To not hit rock bottom

Deep down, I’m a writer
I love to speak up
For the weak and voiceless
Who truly need help

I want to change the world
Just give me a chance
I may not seem special
Outside at first glance

It’s what’s inside that counts
Not gender or race
I’m counting on others
To offer me grace.

So what must I do?

PAY ATTENTION TO ME

I have great potential
I promise, you’ll see!

LIFE LESSONS

LIFE is too ironic for me.

There is a lot of things that i see far more contradicting than what it has to be.

For instance, to find happiness you need to feel pain and sadness first-hand before that.

We need first to make mistakes before we know that we are wrong.

We regret the things in the past and yet at that very present moment we don’t even think what are the consequences.

We find the value of others when they are gone not when they were still alive.

We have food and yet we starve our selves just to look good for others while others have no food to eat.

We fight those who violate the rights of others and yet we are violating their own rights.

We seek peace and yet we create wars, chaos and fear.
We build nations and yet we destroy others.

We tend to make our selves educated and yet, are we really educated in the eyes of others?

We put rules and yet others are exempted to those rules.

We preach the moral values and religious things and yet our actions are contrary to that.

We advocate freedom and yet we put borders.

We want to improve our health by producing medications that are far more hideous than the natural.

We teach life’s meaning and yet we don’t know one bit what life really is.

This is the hypocrisy and the irony of life that we are living. 

SUBTLETY

You smile at me like you know me. You have tried to understand me.

You decided I was too complicated to comprehend and analyze, so you moved along and agreed without hesitation that I am different.

Shocker.

I hate to tell you this, but my mind is connected and wired in a strange manner that yet nobody I have ever encountered can begin to understand.

I think of things most people have never even realized, and I realize people in their confusion while trying to realize what I already have.

Confused? Try to follow, because I lead out and only notice things that people like me see.

Thoughts drown you daily, but for me it is the only way to swim and function.

Don't assume or complicate things because you'll find yourself coming to the conclusion of an unwavering mess, constantly overbearing your chest with lies you will regret with a hanging head and sunken shoulders.

Meditation is a synchronizing sanctuary where I spend most of my time alone.

I'm sorry I can't take you along because I never have before and I don't plan on trying anything new anytime soon. They call it space.

Don't try to see through me because you'll just reach a wall and a veil of hypnotism of the life I live, and the life I am living. Just take me as I am.

Avoid the deep stuff. You don't have to understand me, or even try to because I like the confirmation of my soul entrusted within myself and in a lockbox where my heart is the key.

Just shake your head and agree with me.

Accept what you see when you look at me. I'll share my thoughts, but it will cost a penny.

Just know you will never ever come close to actually knowing me.

I wear a mask that has the craftsmanship of subtlety. You do not know me. 

BEAUTIFUL ME

                

I am a drop of sunshine in a doubt of uncertainirty.

I am a comforting voice in a crowd of chaos.

You have a hard time following me? Try harder, because I lead out.

I am redemption after facing my darkest demons in the dark.

I am a smile in the presence of my deepest fears.

I am the same person in the light and the dark.

Genuine, honest, real. I am authentic.

I am a drop of sugar water in an ocean of salt.

I am a lense of clarification in a jumbled mess.

I am a reassuring hand on a shoulder of a black cloud. I am the silver lining you missed.

I am constant, a loyal companion.

I am an embrace at the end of a hard task.

I am victory.

I am beautiful. Beautiful me.